@ War With My Demons & fears

 

lately I’ve been having this problem

i hear voices inside my head

telling me , or should i say forcing me 

to do things i dont know if they are good or bad 

ive been thinking a lot lately 

life , me , dreams , future , past 

Where did i go wrong ??

what did i do right ???

is that what they call it middle age or past age crises

i dont know what they call it 

& i dont want to know or think about what they call it 

but … still dont have answers for my real questions  

 

isn’t it sad & shame :

you wasted your life time chasing your impossible dreams … 

trying to make them com true 

but you end up with nothing 

as i was young .. i used to live my life 

i stumble , i fall , but soon i get up on my feet & fight back 

but now .. as i grow older & older 

I’m just living & surviving 

for what just left of my life 

i guess i just lost the edge , lost my spark 

i used to say i have lost a fight , but i didn’t lose my battle

now … did i really just lost the fight, or i lost the battle   

all i know is … I’m just surviving .. trying to live again 

but I’m too old to try or fight any more battle 

im not giving up or giving in my believes

i still have my dreams & hopes , though they are all burned out 

but .. they still dreams & hopes 

a memory of what i used to dream & hope for  

Some thing to remind me of what i used to be 

 i wish if i can go back in time 

the time when i was much younger than now 

to live the life i used to have 

to correct the mistakes that i did long time ago

or maybe just do them again & laugh at my self again